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> Red Dead Revolver: Written by: Jesse Pierson
 Publisher: Rockstar Price: 49.99 Genre: Action M for Mature
When you hear the word “Western” you’re most likely to either
think of Clint Eastwood, or one of his movies. Now that we have that down, let me tell you what you don't think of. Midget
Clowns, fat guys who wear explosive suits, a zombie, a guy with a cannon on his arm, a man who can teleport, baked beans...well,
you would think of these things if you spent 40 of the last 48 hours playing Red Dead Revolver. It‘s so mind numbingly
stupid that you may lose IQ points playing it. The graphics are shoddy, the controls are way too "arcade", there’s no
real replay value, it’s repetitive, it’s too short, there’s so many glitchës... man why did I play this?
The game starts out just like the Outlaw
Josey Whales, his family dies, which leads to revenge, blah, blah, blah. Soon after that are meaningless missions and bad
boss fights. There is one mission that stands out early on (a jumping from car to train mission while trying to reach the
conductor type of thing). Sounds cool? Well it would be if not for all of the horrible glitches.
Towards the ending of the game the pace really begins picks up with an assault on the governors mansion, a quick draw competition,
and a jump-from-horse-to-train mission... but that’s it. All the other missions you can beat by throwing dynamite over
a wall. What’s the fun in that?
Well I guess Rockstar tried their best, which was not nearly enough. The only part I enjoyed the most was the music, but
evil villains make it almost non-existent in 90 percent of the missions.
If you were in the same room with me while I was playing you'd hear me yelling, "Please no! Not a close up! NOOOOO... !
“ The graphics are so blocky when it comes to the character models. You could have sworn that Rockstar engineers had
forgot to do their jobs right. Could someone please explain how my bayonet rifle has no bayonet?
Red Dead Revolver may have some good voice acting, but that’s as good as it gets for sound. All weapons, animals’
etc. use the same recycled sound effects unendingly. Barely any better then the graphics.
If you enjoyed Time Crisis or any of the ‘lite’ gun games, you'll love the controls. However, it does
tend to get repetitive. Sometimes while riding an animal, controls don’t respond well. If you aim at your enemy's head,
you end up shooting his foot. This occurrence happens through the entire game. However the quick draw controls are very nice.
You use the right thumb-stick to draw the gun, and then you fire away with the R button. Plus with the dead aim you can never
miss. Believe it or not the control isn‘t that bad, and possibly the best part of the game nonetheless.
Aside from the Multiplayer mode there really is no replay value. The lackluster "Bounty Hunter" mode doesn't help due to
the fact that the missions are too hard because of the unresponsive control issues. You can play it again and buy information
about the players, but do I look like I want to know about a midget clown’s background story? The Multiplayer mode is
fun... for a few minutes. The poker card power ups is a creative idea but sometimes YOU had the pair not player 3. There are
three modes altogether, and unfortunately, only one’s good because you use the draw gunfight controls.
Red Dead Revolver received an M rating do to the fact that it supports Blood, Gore and questionable language. However,
a Teen rating would have seemed more suitable due to the fact that there’s not very much blood and/or gore.
What do you get when you combine bad graphics, lackluster sound effects, somewhat unresponsive controls, no replay value,
dumb A.I, and a ton of glitches? You get a total waste of money called Red Dead Revolver.
Graphics: 4.0 | Sound: 5.0 | Control: 7.0
| Replay: 5.0 | Overall Game Score: 5.0/10
       
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